Listening Skills Can Be Exhausting! When we listen, it seems there are so many different techniques to hear somebody. We can just listen and then express ourselves. Many times, we cannot wait to hear the other person take a breath so we can speak. Yet nobody really is heard. I am sure you have taken part in a conversation like that. I bet that you are exhausted after you are done. Another type of conversation is when we hear the other person go on and on and on without ever taking a breath. How do they do that without taking a breath? I always find it amazing, yet boring and tiring. What I want to demonstrate in the next few articles is a communication model where all are heard and able to express. It is almost equal. Does that sound impossible? It is not. Yet on the other hand, maybe the other person really needs to vent, to be heard, and you agree to do so This is the Most Important Step to Listening! Asking myself, what is my intention to speaking with this person? This is the most important question I could ask myself. Intention is a plan. Therefore, what reason will I be communicating with this person? It is that simple, yet not so easy. Honesty Comes in Handy When Listening: My intention can be many strategies. Maybe I want something, to manipulate them. I told you that this is about honesty. Maybe, you think you have to listen to them. You do not. It would not be honest. So, back to our intention of communicating with someone with a clear intention. What really is your intention to listening to someone? Identifying My Intention: Your intention should be one of authenticity. If my intention is to manipulate and only get what I want, in the end I will suffer. I want my intention to be where we meet everyone's wants. Do you think it is impossible? No, it is simple. When I speak to someone, I want my intention to be where I want to listen to the other. My intention is to understand the other person and that they understand me. Visualize This Happening: Imagine how this conversation would feel. Great? Seeing you totally focused on the other person and them later focused on what you are saying. It all begins with your intention. Before the Conversation: Set your intention, or your plan, before you speak to the person. If you are going to meet with someone whether for personal or a business conversation, take a few moments to decide what your intention is. If it is to understand and connect with the other person, then go ahead. If it is for other reasons, you may want to look at changing your intention. Maybe even cancel your meeting until you can transform your intention to a life enriching one.
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