Your mindset determines how you see the world. It determines your perception of the world, and this perception is like a filter. The great thing about filters is that they can be adjusted. Take a water filter. Maybe it is set to filter out only chlorine, but it also lets all the other yucky stuff through. What if it were adjusted to also filter out heavy metals and other harmful chemicals? That would be better, wouldn't it? Well, your perception can be adjusted too. You can adjust it so that it will filter out the negative and unhelpful aspects of a situation, so that you are left with only the aspects that are constructive and positive. With some hard work, you can rebuild your perception from the bottom up if you need to. When it comes to the behavior of your child, it is important for you to consider your perception of the situation. If your child is expressing negative behavior, what is your perception of this situation? How is your filter set? We come from generations of parents and adults who have worked on the assumption that children intend to do wrong. Is this also your perception? If you react in a negative way to your child's behavior, this will only fall upon the child and he will begin to feel negatively about himself. First and foremost, just because your child is exhibiting negative or bad behavior, it does not mean that your child is bad. This is so important. We all have behaviors that are based on our experiences in life. Say your child is disruptive when meeting new kids. Why? Maybe once your child tried to introduce himself to a new group of children at school, and they made fun of him. This one experience was enough to change his perspective of the world and to change his behavior. His perspective or filter told him that being nice and normal was not the way to impress a new group of kids. He began to introduce himself in a way that would impress new kids, through negative behavior. He thinks this is the only way, based on the first experience he had, so it is what he always does in situations with new people. The first step in helping your child is for you to examine your own perspective on life in general. Are you a positive person or a negative person? Is the glass half full or half empty? It is crucial that you gain a positive perspective on life. The more positive energy you exert and have within your home, the more motivating it will be for your child to change his negative behavior. You have to make the decision now to change the way you operate in a negative situation and this will impact on the negative behavior of your child.
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