I needed a good laugh, so I thought it might be fun to capture some of the most hilarious moments from the big screen with some funny quotes. Read on and enjoy! â€Would you please put some pants on? I feel weird having to ask you twice.â€- Bradley Cooper in The Hangover â€He wants to make money. You know - live in a nice house with wide windows and locks. You can't expect him to live forever with his sister and the nipple-twisting that goes on there.â€- Ellen Albertini Dow in The Wedding Singer â€Don't let him out. The eagles will snatch him.â€- Betty White in The Proposal â€Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to her, or something. I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.- Jeff Daniels in Dumb and Dumber â€Okay, we just take everything that's embarrassing and we move it out of here so it doesn't look like you live in Neverland Ranch.â€- Seth Rogen in The 40-Year-Old Virgin â€Stay calm, okay? Let's not lose our heads. It's... it's a fine ID; it'll... it's gonna work. It's passable, okay? This isn't terrible. I mean, it's up to you, Fogell. This guy is either gonna think 'Here's another kid with a fake ID' or 'Here's McLovin, a 25 year-old Hawaiian organ donor'. Okay? So what's it gonna be?â€- Michael Cera in Superbad â€We'll just tell your mother that... we ate it all.â€- Eugene Levy in American Pie â€I think I do remember hearing somethin' on TV about colon cleansin'. They say everyone should have one. I'm thinkin' about gettin' me an appointment and go down and get my colon cleansed thoroughly.†â€You want your colon cleansed? Fine, I'm gonna clean mine!†[Farts] â€There, my colon is clean. My colon is squeaky clean!â€- Eddie Murphy as The Klumps in The Nutty Professor â€Sex will get you dinner and a movie, holding out will get you cars and jewels and houses.â€- Tyler Perry as Madea in I Can Do Bad All By Myself â€Look, Little Jack was crying so I picked him up and gave him some hugs. Then I went into the kitchen to answer the phone and when I came back, he had let himself out of the playpen, put on Scarface and glued his hands to the rum bottle. Ok?â€- Ben Stiller in Meet the Fockers â€I'd like to dedicate this to my grandpa, who showed me these moves.†â€Aww, that is so sweet.†[Audience applauds] â€Is he here? Where's your grandpa right now?†â€In the trunk of our car.â€-Olive played by Abigail Breslin to the beauty Pageant M.C.’s in Little Miss Sunshine â€Some of the dresses ya' got, ya' need two hairdos to wear.â€- Woody Harrelson in Kingpin â€Hey man. It's me again. I was just taking a whizz. Thought you might have called. Okay, laterâ€I was just blow drying my hair, thought I heard the phone ring. Ah... has that ever happened to you? Anyway... call me, we'll talk about it.â€- Jim Carrey in The Cable Guy â€Three tomatoes are walking down the street -- a poppa tomato, a momma tomato, and a little baby tomato. Baby tomato starts lagging behind. Poppa tomato gets angry, goes over to the baby tomato, and squishes him... and says, 'Ketchup.'â€- Uma Therman as Mrs. Mia Wallace in Pulp Fiction "Marriage is like a tense, unfunny version of Everybody Loves Raymond, only it doesn't last 22 minutes. It lasts forever."- Paul Rudd in Knocked Up "Is that a rain coat?"- Jared Leto "Yes it is! In '87, Huey released this, Fore, their most accomplished album. I think their undisputed masterpiece is "Hip to be Square", a song so catchy, most people probably don't listen to the lyrics. But they should, because it's not just about the pleasures of conformity, and the importance of trends, it's also a personal statement about the band itself."- Christain Bale in American Psycho By: Frank Bilotta
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