Simply put, self-esteem means placing a value on oneself, on one's performance. We're constantly estimating our self-worthusually based on whatever happened five minutes ago. Strange how if someone looks at us funny, our self-esteem can suddenly plummet. Self-esteem is less stable than any stock market it vacillates wildly, nothing but peaks and valleys, with no plateaus, no slow but steady ascents. That is, unless you learn how to promote healthy self-esteem. Self-esteem does have a bit of a snowballing effect; if we learn to begin thinking positively of ourselves, and placing a high value on our abilities, that positive energy will feed on itself, and multiply. It simply has to be promoted properly. We all have a voice inside ourselves that is constantly evaluating our actions and thoughts, and gauging our self-worth. Even the Ancient Greek philosopher, Socrates, spoke of his little demon," the voice that guided him from within, separating truth from untruth. Unfortunately, for many of us, our inner voice is likely to exaggerate, in both directions. Sometimes it builds us up to dangerous proportions; at other times, it kicks us while we're down, piling insults upon our heads. Exaggerations of this sort are hardly productive. If we have an inflated sense of self-esteem, we may seriously miscalculate our abilities, and bite off more than we can chewnot to mention offending people around us with our overblown ego. Still worse, perhaps, is the feeling that we are completely worthless. Low self-esteem like this can reduce us to complete inactivity, since we feel as if we are incapable of anything. At this point, a vicious circle can be set in motion; we do nothing because we think we can't do anything, and soon we think we can't do anything, because we are doing nothing. It can be hard to snap out of this sort of cycle of low self-esteem. How can we foster a healthy, level-headed sense of self-esteem? We all know people who have it; many of them maintain it, almost naturally, from early childhood. Throughout life, they have the feeling, without seeming cocky, that they're capable of doing wonderful things. How can we achieve this sort of feeling, if we weren't born with it? The good news is that good self-esteem can become a habit, if we show some determination in establishing it. If we're used to thinking poorly of ourselves, it can be difficult to gain this sort of momentum. Here are a just a few pointers on how to build self-esteem: 1. Be constructive. After victories or setbacks, offer constructive criticism or congratulations. Keep an even keel. Whatever you do, don't beat your self up. 2. Learn from your errors, but don't become fixated on them. Draw the right lessons from your setbacks, then move on. 3. Take some pride in your achievements. We all have accomplishments to be proud of, and talents to make use of. Never lose sight of what makes you unique. 4. Everything in moderation. That includes your goals. Dream big, certainlybut realize those dreams in manageable steps. This way, you'll be setting yourself up for success, not for frustration. 5. Encounter the unknown. Don't get complacent. Get out there and do something you've never done before. You'll discover talents you didn't know you hadand that sort of self-discovery can't help but increase your self-esteem.
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