Divorce of parents is often one the most significant events in a children’s lives. It can have an adverse impact on their malleable minds and psychology. It is difficult for children when they find that the two big support systems in their lives are suddenly falling apart. All too often, parents inadvertently bring children into the grind of stress and strain that comes with divorce. Children’s inward insecurity and vulnerability take outward forms of anger, loneliness and frustration. Parents, often caught up in their own agony and anxiety of separation, tend to overlook the trauma children go through. By divorcing, parents are choosing to make a change that will hopefully better their lives. But most of the time the children are not given due consideration in how the divorce unfolds. This is particularly true when parents engage in a traditional confrontational method of divorce. Fortunately there are divorce methods that place more of an emphasis on the needs of the children There are three methods of divorce resolution: litigation, mediation and collaboration. Let’s look at all these from children’s perspective. Divorce through litigation: it involves filing papers, complaints, visits to attorneys and courts. Though it is the most clear and secure method to set things right for children, so that no disputes arise at later date; the intricacies and complications involved in the process create distrust. Litigation may address and redress the dispute but it abides by the law and may fail to take care of children’s emotional needs. Parents will be bound to obey the decision of the court; but can it bind the free will of children’s undulating mind? Moreover, the extended time taken by the judicial proceedings put children through long period of uncertainty. Divorce through mediation: This comparatively smoother resolution method involves parents sitting across the table in presence of a third party that acts as an amicable mediator. The presence of a mediator can lubricate the process and reduce undue confrontations . The best feature of this type of resolution is that it is peaceful as it avoids harsh one to one confrontations between the parents. The party that is mediating can lay emphasis on children’s perspective and welfare. The mediator can interact with the children and chart certain conditions for divorcees, which will offer the children a better path to the future. This resolution method is especially effective in resolving custodial issues for children. Divorce through collaboration: This divorce resolution method is the best amalgamation of the above two methods. It allows attorneys to create environments for better and easier solution that facilitates easy settlement within the frame of law. This method gives more freedom to voice opinions and control the outcome. This comparatively less expensive method gives children a say in the decision that are going to affect their lives. This process also reduces the period of time required for the final decision, thereby putting the subjects through stress. Parents can reach cordial settlement and file the decision in court before actually going through excruciating judicial process. The collaborative approach for divorce resolution is often the best option for children.
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